Healing from trauma takes courage—but it also takes connection. Research consistently shows that one of the most powerful factors in therapy isn’t just the technique being used, but the relationship between client and therapist.
In our recent webinar, When Trauma Recovery Stalls: What’s Next?, Dr. Sarah Dropman and Dr. Kelly Callahan highlighted how essential the therapeutic alliance is for moving trauma recovery forward—and why it can sometimes be the very place where things get stuck.
Why the Relationship Matters
Psychologist Edward Bordin described the therapeutic alliance as having three parts:
- Agreement on goals – working toward a shared vision of healing.
- Agreement on tasks – clarity about how therapist and client will work together.
- Bond – the trust and sense of connection that make therapy safe.
When all three are in place, therapy becomes a collaborative journey. For trauma recovery, that bond is especially important—because trauma often happens in relationships, and healing must also happen in relationship.
The Catch-22 of Trauma and Trust
Here’s the challenge: the very thing needed for healing (trust) is often the hardest thing to build after trauma. Clients may feel wary, distant, or unsure about opening up. Therapists may feel discouraged when progress feels slow.
But this isn’t resistance—it’s part of the process. Trauma impacts attachment, and rebuilding trust takes time, patience, and compassion. The therapist’s role is to recognize the effects of trauma on the alliance and manage the relationship between client and clinician.
Ruptures in the Alliance
From the perspective of the therapist, obstacles in the alliance can show up in many different ways, including but not limited to:
- Frustration with the client. The therapist may be struggling with negative thoughts about or feel like they are working harder than the client.
- Feeling unable to help the client. The therapist may be feeling like they are a ‘bad therapist’. This can also happen in tandem with frustration toward the client.
- Seemingly inconsistent goals between client and therapist. Despite the therapist’s best efforts to listen, engage , and revise the treatment plan, the client may continually disagree with the therapist’s understanding.
How to Strengthen the Alliance and Get Unstuck
Clinicians know that the therapeutic alliance is the foundation of all effective trauma work. Here’s how we nurture it:
- Destigmatize the effects of trauma. Highlight the symptoms and behavioral patterns that clients exhibit as survival strategies.
- Cultivate compassion. Recognizing the therapeutic relationship as a potential source of threat for the client.
- Co-create understanding. Clients are the experts on their own internal experiences, and therapists can offer maps to help them understand what’s unfolding.
Connection as a Path to Healing
When recovery stalls, its often a signal to return to the function: the therapeutic alliance. A strong relationship can provide the stability needed to move into deeper trauma processing.
At Mind Therapy Clinic, we believe that healing begins with connection. Together, clients and therapists can build the trust that makes recovery possible.
👉 If you’re seeking a safe, supportive place to begin or continue your trauma recovery, contact us today.